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The Secret Sauce to Getting What You Want!!!

Last week, I shared a video on Instagram and LinkedIn titled “This might be the reason people are not giving you what you want.” If you missed it, hurry to my Instagram and LinkedIn- It's definitely an eye-opener!!! The idea is if people aren't giving you what you want, it's because you don't take yourself seriously!!!

I know, I know, you're probably rolling your eyes and thinking: “Emma, what are you talking about? Of course, I take myself seriously". Hold that thought. Let me finish presenting my case using these three criteria, and then you can decide whether I am unto something or not.

1- Guarding Your Territory: Do you stand your ground on personal boundaries? And I mean with everyone- friends, family, colleagues, bosses, even authoritative figures like pastors, professors, leaders, or affluent individuals?

If you find yourself struggling to enforce your boundaries, which are based on your values and beliefs, then you, my friend, need to start working on your personal development so you can start taking yourself seriously. Asking people to respect your boundaries is not disrespecting theirs. Plus, every time you allow someone to violate your boundaries, you slowly lose their respect.

2- More than Just a Fling!!! Every January, most of us make New Year's resolutions and outline our goals for the upcoming year. We're now in July, seven months into the year. Let's do a progress check!!! Have you been making steady progress and staying consistent with your goals? While it might seem unrelated, your commitment to these resolutions and goals lets your subconscious know if you take yourself seriously.

Did you know that the first person you disappoint in life is YOU??? Not your parents, your teachers, your spouse, or even your children. Before you disappoint them, the first person you let down every time you break your promises, procrastinate, find excuses, or show a lack of commitment is YOU. And because you know who you are, that's why you have trouble taking yourself seriously and expecting others to take you seriously as well.

3- You Matter- Team No Shame!!! Another way people can tell that you don't take yourself seriously is when you constantly put others' needs before your own.

black woman wearing glasses sipping coffee

You unconsciously tell yourself that you don't matter as much as them, and when others see you operate that way, they don't see the need to give you the respect and seriousness you deserve. Some of you may argue: "But Emma, I don't want to seem selfish". My response is: "BE SELFISH!!!" If you're always putting your plans on the back burner to please or appease others, this month is the perfect time to level the playing field by putting your goals to the forefront.

Now, do you agree that you might have some personal development work to do?

Remember, keep your boundaries firm, honor your promises to yourself, and prioritize your needs. Because taking yourself seriously is the secret sauce to getting what you want.

Until next time,


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Boundaries … yes! However, consistency, no I need to work on keeping commitments that I make to myself

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